out loud.

assalamualaikum.

may peace be upon you.

what a lovely way to greet someone, no?

because i think when it comes down to it, that's what most of us want. to be at peace with ourselves, our decisions in life and the people that we love.

for most of my life, i've always been that responsible person. applying early for jobs, making sure all bills are paid on time, making sure budget was in check. but i think it's okay to not know where we're headed sometimes. how would i have imagined my life would change so much with A here?

i think you build the future you want to have. but without courage and effort, it will all go to waste. and confidence. i've always grown up as a less than confident kid, but as i've grown older, i've realized you don't need to shout to be heard.

i don't want to be stuck in a life, doing a job that i don't feel any passion for. i want to care about the things that i do. and for better or worse, that is a decision that i am at peace with.

thirty days

have been back in my baking and cooking mood in the past week. found a great banana peanut butter choc chip muffin recipe that works great as a quick breakfast. we finished the batch within a week, just bringing them to office every morning. and the upside is that it's a healthy muffin made out of bananas, wholewheat flour, greek yogurt, honey, fresh milk and a lil bit of brown sugar. ok, i know i sound like a fod geek but i don't care. i could spend forever looking up and trying out new recipes.

made dark chocolate brownies again last night. even stayed up to make choc chip cookie batter that i threw into the fridge to rest for a night or two, before i get to baking them soon.

also sneaked in a little late night treat. had made some apple crumbles and put them in individual jars for easy serving and had them with two scoops of choc chip ice cream. really don't know why i pay so much for average desserts when eating out when i can have my own, slightly healthier versions of them.

don't worry, i don't just pig out on desserts all day long. most of the time, we just keep a bit and give away the rest to friends. trying to keep a conscious tab on what we eat these days and also its costs. budgeting will soon enough be my best friend.

took a sick day last week. it's just so crazy, at my last job, i went a year without taking a single sick leave. but i've been so overwhelmed and so lethargic this year. maybe i'm just trying to do too much at once. maybe, maybe not.

i thought i did okay earlier today. of course i was nervous. i'm nervous before i do anything. plus, it's been awhile since i actually answered those kind of questions. i guess my skills are kind of rustic but hey, practice makes perfect.